My little fly-fishers, the people who do really matter. (And yes, it was as cold as it looks. Rocky Mountain National Park just weeks ago. While it was 70 here in Boulder. Sheesh.)

What are You Avoiding, and Why?

I often write about the importance of taking care of yourself first—that way, you’ll have enough energy to take care of your loved ones. So I should know this better than anyone, right? Yeah, right. Except for when life gets really, really busy and everything swirls into one crazy-fast ball, and before you know it—boom!—you’ve […]

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Anne Lamott

Why We’re So Frigging Busy (and What We Can Do About It)

Is it just me, or is life challenging as hell right now? I feel like everyone I know is going through some kind of crisis (or many crises). One of the ways I see this showing up is through busyness, overscheduling and a shitload of extra stress. (Hint: none of which actually help.) So today, […]

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Photo by Sebastian Boguszewicz courtesy of Unsplash

How to Reconnect with Your Spouse in 6 Seconds

When you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, hug him (or her) for at least 6 seconds to get the oxytocin flowing. Commonly known as the love and bonding hormone, oxytocin activates the neurotransmitters in your brain that connect you with your loved one, and when it’s flowing, watch out! You’ll start to feel better almost […]

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Photo courtesy of Rene Reichelt at Unsplash

13 Ways to Tell if You’re Checking Out of Your Marriage (and How To Fix it Before Your Spouse Leaves)

Kevin wrote to tell me he’s been working his ass off to provide food and shelter for his family. He works long hours, and when he gets home, he’s too exhausted to connect. His wife’s resentful as hell, and he doesn’t feel great about their marriage, either. But someone has to pay the bills, right? […]

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This is what my backyard looked like this morning after a new foot of snow. Would you believe I even shoveled a path out for the dog?

How to Take Back Your Power and Dig Out of Your Resentment (One Shovelful at a Time)

Lately, I’ve been getting a lot of pleas for help around this whole resentment thing. Yesterday, two women wrote me complaining that their husbands weren’t there for there emotionally or financially during some intense life challenges. And then there was the man who asked for advice after his wife physically and emotionally distanced herself from […]

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9 Steps Book Cover 3x4

The book is out–and it’s FREE this weekend!

I’m SO excited to announce that my new book, 9 Steps to Heal Your Resentment and Reboot Your Marriage, is now available! As a giant thank you to all of you incredible folks, I’d like to offer you this book for FREE  tomorrow and Saturday (until midnight MST Sat, December 13th). All you have to […]

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How the Past Affects Your Resentment (and What You Can Do About It)

Hi folks! Thanks so much for all your emails about last week’s tips! I’m SO glad that my tips on communicating more clearly (so we can let go of our resentment) were so helpful. For today’s post, I’d like to dig into some of the deeper roots behind our resentment—the (gulp) past! So strap yourself […]

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Image courtesy of Idea Go at

11 Ways to Ease Your Resentment (and Still Get What You Want)

So, how did Thanksgiving go? Anyone still standing? I hope so, because we still have a few more weeks of holidays to go! So let’s jump right in with a few more tips for surviving the holidays and getting rid of your resentment. After my last post, lots of folks emailed to let me know […]

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Don't let this be you! (Art by my awesome kindergartener and friend)

How to Survive the Holidays Without Killing Your Spouse

Is your spouse driving you nuts? If you’re anything like the rest of us, you’re feeling stressed and overextended now that the holidays have kicked in. Add some holiday travel and extended family into the mix and suddenly you’re drowning. Let’s see if I can help by sharing a few tips for surviving the holidays […]

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The Sex-Starved Marriage (and How to Fix it)

I wanted to share this TEDx talk with you because I think it can help a lot of us. In this thought-provoking talk, Michele Weiner-Davis shows us why sex plays such an important role in communication and connection, then teaches us what we can do to fix it. Especially recommended for anyone who feels like […]

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