Thank God Our Kitchen Remodel is Finally Done (Or: Now I REALLY Understand Why So Many People Get Divorced During a Remodel)

Out with the old....

Good news: our kitchen’s finally done!  And I, for one, am pretty damn happy about it.

Because the thing I absolutely stupidly didn’t realize about a kitchen remodel is how much friggin work it really is.  (Yeah, yeah, I’m kinda dense about this stuff, I’ll admit it.)

There’s a bunch of small details that need to be figured out all the time, sure.  But that’s not what’s going to really make you crazy. What’s going to blow your mind is just how much you and your honey-bunny are going to fight over everything.  Everything, do you hear me?

I know, I know. I didn’t believe it, either.

But I think I’ve finally figured out why a house remodel ends up leading to so much marital discord.  It’s because you’re not able to take care of anything you need to do in real life, much less get any actual Work work done.

I thought we’d have it easier because we both work from home, but here’s what ended up happening for me: I pretty much stopped working.  Luckily, I was able to put most of my projects on the back burner, which made it easy for me to a) wait the zillion hours it took our time-challenged-but-awesome contractor to show up and b) crack lots of jokes about how ridiculously crazy this whole process was.

And in with the new. Is this awesome or what?

Ken wasn’t so lucky.  He still had plenty of deadlines and conference calls to hit, which meant that he was constantly shuffling around the house trying to find a relatively-quiet spot where he could work in peace.  Poor guy.

The other reason we got through this with splitting up or divorcing was because neither of us got too crazy over all the tiny little decisions we had to make on a daily basis.  Meaning: neither one of us dug in our heels and became completely crazed over what we could or couldn’t live without.  Examples include (but are not limited to): a) It’s him or me!  b) I can’t bear this countertop!

But I could see how we could’ve locked horns and entered into a death spiral on any one of these million little details.  Especially when you’re already pissed off about something else in your marriage and just not, ah, saying anything about it (a.k.a. stuffing).

Watch out for that one, folks, because any kind of remodel can easily end up sending you over the edge, especially if you’re anywhere near grumpy and/or pissed off to begin with.   And I speak from experience here: there’s no way in hell we would’ve survived a remodel like this last year.  Absolutely no way.  We would have morphed into demon spawn as soon as we started even talking about it.

But now that we’re through to the other side and have this brand-new, kick-ass kitchen, we’re happy as clams.

Well, you know, mostly.

Even though we’re finally through with all the little painting projects we tacked on at the last minute (like painting the boys’ room a nice little blue they picked out), Nico’s still plotting away.  He seems to think we have these guys on retainer, or something, like the mafia.  Here are some examples of all the projects he now wants to hire out:

  • “Mom, I’m going to hire those guys to build an extra floor on the top of our house!”
  • “I’m going to hire them to blow out this wall [between the kids’ rooms] and put in a bathroom here.  Then, I’m going to hire them to build a tree house in the backyard.  And then put a pool in.”

Oh wait. I think the pool idea was Gabriel’s.

Either way, looks like it’s time for another Money/Values/What the Hell are We Teaching Our Kids About Life Conversation with Ken.  What fun!~

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3 Responses to Thank God Our Kitchen Remodel is Finally Done (Or: Now I REALLY Understand Why So Many People Get Divorced During a Remodel)

  1. Emily April 9, 2012 at 10:31 am #

    Your new kitchen looks beautiful! And I know what you went through, I’m in the crux of it right now! But, (especially in your case) seeing the finished product makes it all worthwhile!

    • tpajevic April 9, 2012 at 12:37 pm #

      Thanks, Emily! It really is worth it, event though you’re probably losing your mind along the way. I don’t know if this is true or not, but a friend of mine who does feng shui told me that the one of the reasons things get so messed up during a remodel is that you’re letting out all of that leftover energy from the people who used to live there before you, and that ends up complicating everything. Interesting to think about if nothing else. Hang in there!

  2. erin patrick May 23, 2016 at 4:38 am #

    Great post! We are also looking forward to remodel our kitchen and was shopping around for some ideas that we can get within the budget. Last time we did it, we blew our budget before we completed the work. I really love how you have simplified things in this post. Thanks.

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