The Myth of the Multitasking Husband

My husband is an accomplished multi-tasker—at work.  When he’s working, he’s able to juggle 396 projects (with 396 projects’ worth of conference calls and email) with a steady hand.  But as soon as he’s done with work, this ability instantly disappears.  Ask him to carry on a conversation while he’s loading the dishwasher or watching the children, and poof, insta-lobotomy.

Ever wonder why your hubby is unable to pick up your kids’ distress signals from another room?  It’s because he’s biologically unable to multitask when he’s at home and around you and/or the children.  I know, I know–it might be hard to swallow such ground-breaking news.  But lest you doubt it, I’ve got never-ending stories from friends (in place of systemic research) to support this previously unacknowledged phenomenon.

Why is this?

What evil biological transformation occurs to change our husbands from multitasking overachievers at work into slow-thinking, lumbering people who need to be pushed out of the way when you’re trying to rescue your youngest from brain-swelling head-on collisions in the living room?

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